Sometimes I think we have to stop telling God how to work.

William Ramier wrote
at 4:08am
Last weekend, I was watching the Gospel of John. Probably, as much as anything, it was to help me with the anxiety of going back to work. Anyway, as it often does, something "jumped out at me". When Jesus is speaking with the official, in the fourth chapter of the Gospel of John, he says that none of you will believe unless you see miracles. It got me thinking about my evangelical friends. They believe very strongly in, not only the existence of miracles, but the need for them. They seem to feel that my faith isn't "real" because I haven't "experienced" a miracle. Plus, they question whether I can be an effective tool for God; they don't believe that the Gospel alone can bring people to God. It would seem that for somebody to have more than a shallow relationship with a God they can't "experience", they need to have a road to Damascus type of encounter. So, if I just use words (bring the Gospel to people), it will be like the seed falling on the rocky ground. It won't sink in. Because, I guess, the Spirit never works like that. They have to "experience" God to really believe. I always thought that when Jesus said some of you won't believe unless you see a miracle that it was a bad thing, that He was complaining about their lack of faith. However, if He did indeed mean that one must see a miracle to believe, why did He use the word "some" of you? I have, maybe always, believed that there were different gifts of the Spirit, and that not everybody will have every gift of the Spirit. I find it very discouraging to constantly be told that my faith is not real because I haven't had any "supernatural" experience. Maybe I actually have, and call it by a different name, or experience it differently. There have been times in the past, at worship, when I'm sure I've felt the presence of God. Maybe it's just that I can't articulate that experience to their satisfaction. Or, maybe I've never had a "supernatural" experience, or at least on a grand scale. I've seen the hand of God in my life. That doesn't count? Because it wasn't in a flash of light? Because there was no booming voice? Because I didn't fall to the floor? Part of me would love, love, to have an experience like St. Francis did; and, part of me is afraid to come physically face to face with my God. And, I know it would change my faith; my belief in God would no longer be a choice I make. Maybe God wants me to choose? Do I need to have a road to Damascus experience to be a Christian?

And, sometimes I think we have to stop telling God how to work.