I did something barbaric yesterday, kind of by accident. Mom hosted a corn boil and invited the neighborhood. There were flies flying around the food on the tables. I had the BBQ lighter in my hand and a fly landed on the table in front of me. I pointed it at the fly, moved it closer, and clicked it. I fully expected the fly to fly off unharmed. I was just just goofing around with the lighter, pretending to light Mom's, Cindy's, and Paul's arms earlier. To my horror, the fly was suddenly alight and writhing in pain. I swatted him to kill him immediately. I felt instantly evil, and imagined myself no better than the ruthless ignorant children (or future serial killers) who fry ants with a magnifying glass and take pleasure in the poor creature's suffering. I felt guilty for the split second thoughtless act and odd at the same time for feeling so; I would have thought no more for swatting it in the first place. Am I nuts; or, am I on the right track?
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Please don't censor me; I am trying to be honest and it is not my intention to offend anybody. If I have offended you personally, I ask you to accept my apologizes, forgive me, and consider not visiting my blog for my benefit.